Everything That Glitters Isn’t Gold

By Ericka Wilson

I have something to confess: My heart plays a dope beat, but the shatter from its biggest break wasn’t heard. And when I was finally lended a listening ear from a man who wanted to perceive what was echoing within me, I silenced the rhythm I needed him to hear.

I haven’t always been honest with myself about my flaws and the real-life events rooted in many issues I’ve caused and faced in my 26 years of life. But, my last romantic relationship came with that lesson. I’ve met a decent amount of educated, righteous, good-smelling, funny, loving, honest, toe-sucking, beautiful black men, to know that the men aren’t always the problem, Sis. 

Off topic: this whole #BlackMenDontCheat movement could be a blessing in disguise. Maybe, the more we use this here hashtag, the better chance there is of it becoming the reality. Hey, I’m just being as shady as the lyte could get. #CallItHowYouSeeItRight

So, yeah, some black men are definitely hurt and are definitely out here causing us continuous pain because they don’t know who they truly are. But, this isn’t about them. Straight to my point: many of us black women don’t know how to be happy with ourselves and love who we truly are. This then prevents us from being happy with a man or a woman, whichever you prefer. Currently, I’m embracing the fact that I don’t have all of the knowledge I wish to take in, sometimes I get lost in my thoughts and it impacts the words coming out of my mouth, I have chin hairs and super thin edges, but guess what... I’m still a Super Star! Rhianna told us to shine bright like a diamond, right? So, that’s what I am doing. Especially after she’s been named the richest female musician in the world. #ShesNotSingleButShesDope But, even as I shine bright, I know everything that glitters is not gold. If a man was to put me around his neck today, it would turn his skin green. But, this won’t be the case forever because the poison leaves bit by bit and it eventually runs out. With this knowledge, I’m paying more attention to myself. I’m learning what I don’t like and what I enjoy. I’m being still in my singleness, still with confidence and positivity. Making peace with myself and healing wounds within.

According to the life I’ve lived so far, not everyone will come to your future, and not everyone will come from your past. Not all relationships are going to last. I am more appreciative of all things and people, including myself. Once I became single, I started to realize my inner power. It’s not my season and I’m okay with that. I’m on a walk down a path of deep healing and on this stroll I plan to stop by a few different countries, with different books packed in my bag and a mindset to forever be patient, have faith, spread love, be happy with myself and love myself, including my flaws.

Ericka E Wilson is a producer at News10NBC. She’s the treasurer of the Rochester Association of Black Journalists and co-social chair for the Rochester Young Black Rochester Black Young Professionals.