Life is A-Maze-ing

By Cynshei Wilson

Have you ever dreamed of what your life would be like at 25? I remember being a high school student, hell an elementary student, sitting in class day dreaming about my future. Playing M.A.S.H or reading urban fiction novels picking out my dream house, dream job, dream man, dream life. Just dreaming. I swore up and down I would be married with two kids. A boy and a girl to be exact. And of course the boy had to be the oldest so he could protect his younger sister. I would have a house with a white picket fence, a nice car, a dog, and I would be a successful attorney. All by 25-years-old. That was my dream. And currently at the age of 25, I realize that’s all it was, a damn dream. In reality I’m 25 with my first kid, and she’s a girl by the way. I’m dating a man, I own a run-down car, and taking an extended maternity leave from a job, which is so farfetched from my actual career goals. How did I end up here? I thought I did things the right way. College after high school? Check. Associates degree? Check. Bachelor’s degree? Check. But life? Life has its up and downs. I am no stranger to adversity. But I’d like to think that I am damn good at overcoming it.

Born and raised in the cold, poverty stricken city of Rochester, NY, I was born in the middle of the winter, January of 94. The funny thing is, I hate the snow! I had a less than perfect childhood. My mother was murdered when I was the tender age of 16. Right around the age that young girls need their mom the most, when they began to enter into womanhood. Since I was without a mother, I watched the women around me and took tad bits from here and vowed not to take tad bits from there. Just figuring out what it means to be a woman the best way I knew how. And while I’m still on the path of figuring it all out, I was blessed with a beautiful baby girl, who I was in no way prepared for. But you couldn’t tell me during my pregnancy. Life has a way of knocking you off of your high horse, you know? But this is no woe is me story. Sometimes I fret about how I’m near 30 and entering a mid-life crisis. So, I have to act fast and knock down as many goals as I can before my time runs out. Before some imaginary clock I’m racing stops ticking. Or before all of my college friends enter their career path before me. Or even before my daughter gets older and views her mother as a failure. But the truth is, everyone has a different journey to embark upon. Truthfully, everything may not go as planned, but you have to roll with the punches, turn those lemons into lemonade and enjoy the ride. I may not have all the things I dreamed of, but every day is a fresh start to work towards obtaining them. So keep pushing, sistas! And don’t rush the process! Some days you have to stop and smell the roses. You have to seek out the good in your current situation. Rejoice at every triumph no matter how small and learn a lesson from every failed attempted. Besides, adversity makes for a better story anyway.

Cynshei‘ Wilson is a 25 year old new mother determined to excel in life with her daughter by her side. She has an Associate’s Degree in Criminal Justice and a Bachelor’s Degree as a Legal Studies major. Cynshei’ aspires to attend Howard University’s School of Law. She then wishes to began her career as a Criminal Defense Attorney and end her career wherever her black girl magic takes her.